


Ellen DeGeneres

by Shiggy_Chan



Series: Tumblr Writing Prompts [15]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Blind Date, F/F, ellen degeneres - Freeform, tumblr writing prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-14
Updated: 2019-11-14
Packaged: 2021-01-30 21:11:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21434773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shiggy_Chan/pseuds/Shiggy_Chan
Summary: Ellen DeGeneres
Relationships: Original Female Character(s)/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Tumblr Writing Prompts [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1451311





	Ellen DeGeneres

**Author's Note:**

> This prompt was written by never-close-our-eyes of Tumblr

After wandering around outside for a well over an hour trying to find that damn coffee shop that exists right-smack-dab in the middle of grand-fucking-nowhere, I gave up on the blind date my best friend set me up on. If she really wanted me with this guy she would’ve chose somewhere on this Earth for us to meet up. 

Yawning, I glanced up at the sky. Only noon and yet it was _ nap time. _ A quick inspection of the small town I had been dragged to granted me a park bench without all the screaming kids. In fact, I hadn’t seen a single kid. Some scattered adults with the occasional teenager, but no smalls. I shrugged, not really caring. In a few hours Beth would be back to get me and I could leave and never return. 

I quickly jogged across the street to the bench. As I closed in I noticed that the single bench, which was abnormally long, sat at the top of an incline leading downwards toward a pond. I plopped down on the bench, ignoring the beautiful scenery and yanked my beanie over my eyes, flipped up my hood, and promptly fell asleep. 

I don’t know when I woke up but it felt like hours due to the fatigue in my bones. I didn’t move but I felt that the beanie had slipped up my face. I cracked an eye as to not be blinded and immediately noticed two figures that sat at the other end of the bench. One was clearly female and was picking at the crumbling paint on her nails. The other figure sat much taller than than even me and seemed to also be a woman. She was watching something on her phone with her other arm up on the back of the bench. They didn’t seem to notice or care that I was awake. 

I blinked my eyes open fully and was just about to stretch when the taller one spoke up, breaking the blissful silence. 

“I’d leave you for Ellen DeGeneres.”

The smaller female glared at her and squeaked, “What the fuck happened to me being you’re ‘one and only’?”

“Dude it’s Ellen-fucking-DeGeneres,” I said, unable to help myself. 

They both glanced up in surprise before the tall lady started cackling. The small one punched her arm. When she finally regained her breath she reached over and shook my hand. 

“Ace. Don’t believe I’ve seen you around?”

“Corbyn. Blind date my crackhead of a best friend decided to send me on landed next here,” I explained. 

“Corbyn? As in Valerez? This girl was looking for you about a block back that way,” he pointed to the west, “I’m Valerie by the way.”

“Damn, bitch can’t go an hour without me can she. Wonder what she can’t reach this time,” I sighed. 

Ace snorted and took Valerie by the hand. They stood together and gestured for me to follow. 

“I’d say it was a little more than an hour and that blind date you mentioned? Was it supposed to be with someone named Johnathon Martin?” 

I stretched and followed as I answered. 

“Yeah I think that was the name. Beth even went so far as to remember to tell me where we were meant to meet. I couldn’t find it, so I took a nap.”

That sent Valerie into hysterics. 

“Considering that in the most emotion I’ve seen from her even in this short amount of time, I guess I’ve done something bad?” I asked, one brow raised. 

“No you’re fine. Johnny is her dear brother here. He’s sort of an asshole so you standing him up is quite possibly the greatest part of her day,” Ace explained, barely containing her own giggles. 

“I didn’t mean to, I just couldn’t find the damn café,” I blushed in embarrassment. 

“You mean the only café in town?” Ace questioned. 

“I’ve never been here before, okay,” I defended. 

“Nah it’s fine. It’s even more of a hole-in-the-wall than this town,” she stopped, “There’s your friend, Beth you said?”

I lifted my head staring down the figure that looked me in the eyes. At the same time we both ran for each other. She reached in for a hug and I reached out to whack her. I managed to get my hit in first. She didn’t care and continued to collapse my lungs. I rapidly patted her back to concede. 

We broke apart and this time it was her turn to hit me. 

“Where were you? I was looking everywhere!” She exclaimed. 

“Sleeping,” I admitted sheepishly. 

“You stood up Johnny!” She complained further. 

“Couldn’t find the place.”

She furiously shot her finger out to the side, glaring heavily. Standing there, short and proud, was the coffee shop. 

“Well I must’ve missed it. Besides it was noon. You know that’s nap time,” I pouted. 

Beth rolled her eyes and showed me towards the car. I waved at my escorts and raced towards heated seats. I could hear Beth apologizing to Ace and Valerie for minding my stupid ass. 

A few minutes later she dropped into the car. She revved it and began home. About halfway into the drive she growls, “You knew where it was.”

“Don’t send me places I don’t want to go,” I threatened brightly, reaching out for my phone. 

She slapped it in my hand and sped home. 


End file.
